the Cat in the Hat.
So, do spider's belch? (see post below) This is impossible to discover at the moment, as most spiders have the sense to hide in the cold weather, but I foresee many hours in the Spring spent with my ear pressed to spiders' webs and a pipette of Stella poised, listening for that tell-tale arachnid burp.
This week has been a whirl of school Christmas events. One fete, two shows and two parties. I found myself behind the counter of the 'Book and Toy' stall, proving that I am a brilliant retail manager. "Only 50p for this?" one lovely mum asked, clutching a Buzz Lightyear playset. "Yup," I replied. "It's broken, has bits missing and is covered in something sticky....." "It's still a bargain," she said, and pressed a coin into my hand. Honesty is the best policy.
Pride welled, as I watched my two boys in their respective Christmas shows dance out of time, mumble their lines and glow with a healthy embarrased red (especially when Harry's drum teacher invited me to 'have a go' on one of the kits as the other parents were filing out. That cleared the hall a bit quicker, I can tell you)
My Wife - who I am not allowed to mention - has just told me that I am being unfair to George - my eldest, who I am not allowed to mention - He did not mumble his lines. He spoke them very clearly. There, is everybody happy now?
Damn, now I'm wondering what the arachnid equivalent of 'pardon me' is.
Oh, I've spoken to the solicitor and a couple of the financial people involved this week. I don't know if they dance in time or mumble their lines, but some of them should be really red.